I totally let Sage down. She had been practicing the Pledge of Allegiance in sign language all year. Last Monday she was to perform it with her class in front of the entire school. Well, due to snow, a car accident on the way, and the fact that I had 2 hours of sleep the night before because of work, we walked into the gym just as the class began. She, understandably so, broke down into tears: "why didn't they wait for me?"..."why did I practice so hard?"..."why didn't we leave earlier?", etc, etc, etc. I wanted so badly to cry with her as I held and comforted her in the middle of a sea of students and staff. I think I'll feel bad for some time to come. Some of my great on-line mama friends had the best suggestion though, and I think it helped ease a little of Sage's pain. They had me videotape her doing the Pledge and they all wrote comments, praising her for her hard work and talent. I read her their beautiful words and I could literally see some of the pride in her accomplishment return to her cute little face.
Drew and I both work Friday nights, and he had been taking that night off for the past several weeks to take care of the girls, but could no longer afford to do so. So, last night we arranged to leave them with Summer, a 15 year old girl that lives up the street. the girls have never been left with a teenager. But, she's a good girl: quiet, polite and very shy. At the last minute, her friend Sydney, also from the neighborhood, decided to join her. I thought it was a good idea, as Sydney had been over playing with the girls and Sienna had just warmed up to her. Sydney is Summer's complete opposite: loud, outgoing, assertive. I thought it might work out well for Summer to have a little help for her first night on the job. It turned out okay overall, but leaving initially was extremely difficult for Sienna. She screamed bloody murder, as I felt my heart rip into two pieces: "mommeeeeeeee"......"mommeeeeeeee". I cried the whole way to work. Gosh, I hope next week goes a little better.
So, I get to work this evening and am informed that a little 4 year old girl is on her way from one of our satellite clinics with a chief complaint of "being possessed" and "needing an exorcism," according to her mother. It's definitely not common for us to get someone that young, nor is it common practice for us to perform exorcisms ;) I'd be lying if I didn't say I was looking forward to conducting this evaluation. As I had hoped, she didn't need to be hospitalized. The poor little girl, and her 2 and 5 year old sisters, have witnessed their mom be abused by their dad for their entire lives. Mom would take them out of state to flee the abuse and then would call dad, tell him of their whereabouts and reunite with them. They have been in a shelter for 2 weeks. Last week, mom let them see their dad, and ever since, kiddo has been a raging mess. Yeah, I wish I could have put mom on a hold and locked her up for a while.
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Sunday, November 8, 2009
catching up
Tonight I'm going to actually blog with words instead of pictures since I'm at work and don't have access to my photos. A lot has been going on, so as long as we stay slow here in the ER, hopefully I'll be able to get caught up. Up until now, I've tried to keep my work out of this blog and only focus on the kids. But I think I'm going to change things up a bit and include some details regarding work. For one, because it is such a big part of my life. For two, because I really need an outlet to release some of my work stress and I think it might be therapeutic to write it down. But, Sage and Sienna will always be the main topic of this blog, as they are the main topic of my life!
So, we'll start with Sage. She is absolutely thriving in kindergarten and doing so well both academically and socially. We recently got a letter from the gifted and talented coordinator, saying she is being pulled out into a small group on a regular basis because she is so advanced. This really reaffirmed my decision to start her in kindy at such an early age as opposed to waiting a year like others suggested.
She is officially a reader now. She picked it up so quickly. It all just seemed to click one day and she can pretty much sound out any (simple) word.
She just finished her soccer season. She did not do well at all. I'm still quite confused about why and what her problem really was and where it stems from. She loves the game and was by far the best player on her team. But, she would break down in tears at every single practice/game. She would get upset that she wasn't the first to score, or upset that the other team took the ball away from her, or upset that she missed the goal, and the best was when she broke down into tears because she did score and she didn't want everyone cheering for her. I think it may be a bit of "the only child syndrome" mixed with a bit of perfectionism. Regardless of the reasons, she will be staying away from team sports for a while. I think she wants to try jazz or tap dancing next.
She is also participating in Girl Scouts and is a Daisy (what they call the kindy and first graders) so we meet with her troup every other Sunday. They had their first big activity on Friday night, which was a "Chocolate Factory Event" at her school. Because of my new job I was unable to attend, but Drew and Sage both said they had a great time. She got to make lots of candy, sing songs, do crafts, and interact with the older Girl Scouts. She should get her first badge for attending the event here soon. How exciting, and her great grandma would be so proud!
She and I are still attending church every week (that was my New Years resolution) and she just loves going to bible school and learning new things. The other day we were talking about the holidays and she said: "mom, do you know which holiday is my favorite? It's Christmas. Do you know why?" Of course I do...it's because you get lots of presents, is what I was thinking. But she surprised me and said "Because it's Jesus' birthday."
On a not so good note, she has a pretty bad cavity (and some other more minor problem areas) that has affected the root and therefore she is going to need a baby root canal and then get a cap on the tooth. I feel horrible for allowing this to happen. She had a cleaning 9 months ago and had no cavities. I think since then, we slacked a little with allowing her to be the primary brusher instead of checking to make sure she was thorough. She is understandably quite anxious about the procedure, though they can't get her in until the end of December, unless there is a cancellation before hand. I think I'm as nervous as she is.
She had her 5 year well child checkup and passed with flying colors though she still has her heart murmur. Her pediatrician assures us that it is nothing to worry about. She was 44 inches tall and 40.25 pounds (which just barely allowed her to move into a booster seat!!).
Now on to Sienna. She continues to be quite the firecracker, and her personality just continues to evolve as she becomes more and more vivacious, humorous, silly, and stubborn on a daily basis.
She is finally getting some more teeth. She had been stuck at 10 teeth since she was 12 months old, but just last week, three (and possible a fourth) are popping through, including her two upper canines. Luckily, she doesn't seem to be in any discomfort. She struggles with chronic constipation and though we have her on some OTC meds, it doesn't seem to be helping. I'm reluctant to increase the amount of the medication and think we may need to be referred to a specialist. At her last appt she was 34 inches tall and 21.75 pounds. Still a skinny minny, super-model in the making, just like Sage.
She has recently begun pretend play which just cracks me up. She's always liked to dress up and emulate Sage, but now she'll initiate the play on her own. She'll crawl around the house and meow like a cat or bark like a dog. And oh my gosh is it cute!!
She continues to pick up new words on a daily, sometimes hourly, basis. Her current favorite words are "yeah" and more recently "mine" and "butt", which I'm okay with as long it's not the word "no".
She's experimenting with potty training and sits on her little potty several times a day, though has yet to produce anything.
She is still a very picky eater and I continue to worry way too much about every little bite that goes or doesn't go into her mouth.
She still LOVES LOVES LOVES to dance. I swear this kiddo is going to be a professional dancer. Since she was barely walking, she's exhibited an ability to move and shake like I've never seen, well not from a white baby anyway.
okay, I could obviously go one forever about the girls, but want to focus on work for just a minute.
So, I started my new job as a Psychiatric Social Worker in the ER at Children's Hospital. I've finally completed training and have started my shift, which is Friday 5-midnight, Sat and Sun 5:30pm-2:00am. I knew it was going to be a difficult transition into this setting, but I never knew how heart wrenching it would actually be. Just going to the cafeteria, I always pass little tiny kids that are obviously undergoing chemo or extremely sick in other ways. It's very frequent that there is a trauma kid in the ED and his/her screams are enough to pierce your heart.
Last night though, was particularly rough. A little 2 year old died. She had some ongoing medical issues, but her parents were bringing her in for diarhea. She died on the way to the hospital. Fortunately, I didn't see her body, but some of my coworkers did and it was hard enough to hear them talk about her. I did, however, see her parents (and the other family members who came to be with them) on and off through out the night. I won't soon forget their cries or their tears. I had a lot of trouble sleeping last night/this morning and I can't stop thinking about how fragile life is, how lucky I am to have healthy kids, how unfair it is that so many young innocent little lives have to be ended so abruptly.
...and now the doc just came in and wants me to see a 13 year old ingestion case...
So, we'll start with Sage. She is absolutely thriving in kindergarten and doing so well both academically and socially. We recently got a letter from the gifted and talented coordinator, saying she is being pulled out into a small group on a regular basis because she is so advanced. This really reaffirmed my decision to start her in kindy at such an early age as opposed to waiting a year like others suggested.
She is officially a reader now. She picked it up so quickly. It all just seemed to click one day and she can pretty much sound out any (simple) word.
She just finished her soccer season. She did not do well at all. I'm still quite confused about why and what her problem really was and where it stems from. She loves the game and was by far the best player on her team. But, she would break down in tears at every single practice/game. She would get upset that she wasn't the first to score, or upset that the other team took the ball away from her, or upset that she missed the goal, and the best was when she broke down into tears because she did score and she didn't want everyone cheering for her. I think it may be a bit of "the only child syndrome" mixed with a bit of perfectionism. Regardless of the reasons, she will be staying away from team sports for a while. I think she wants to try jazz or tap dancing next.
She is also participating in Girl Scouts and is a Daisy (what they call the kindy and first graders) so we meet with her troup every other Sunday. They had their first big activity on Friday night, which was a "Chocolate Factory Event" at her school. Because of my new job I was unable to attend, but Drew and Sage both said they had a great time. She got to make lots of candy, sing songs, do crafts, and interact with the older Girl Scouts. She should get her first badge for attending the event here soon. How exciting, and her great grandma would be so proud!
She and I are still attending church every week (that was my New Years resolution) and she just loves going to bible school and learning new things. The other day we were talking about the holidays and she said: "mom, do you know which holiday is my favorite? It's Christmas. Do you know why?" Of course I do...it's because you get lots of presents, is what I was thinking. But she surprised me and said "Because it's Jesus' birthday."
On a not so good note, she has a pretty bad cavity (and some other more minor problem areas) that has affected the root and therefore she is going to need a baby root canal and then get a cap on the tooth. I feel horrible for allowing this to happen. She had a cleaning 9 months ago and had no cavities. I think since then, we slacked a little with allowing her to be the primary brusher instead of checking to make sure she was thorough. She is understandably quite anxious about the procedure, though they can't get her in until the end of December, unless there is a cancellation before hand. I think I'm as nervous as she is.
She had her 5 year well child checkup and passed with flying colors though she still has her heart murmur. Her pediatrician assures us that it is nothing to worry about. She was 44 inches tall and 40.25 pounds (which just barely allowed her to move into a booster seat!!).
Now on to Sienna. She continues to be quite the firecracker, and her personality just continues to evolve as she becomes more and more vivacious, humorous, silly, and stubborn on a daily basis.
She is finally getting some more teeth. She had been stuck at 10 teeth since she was 12 months old, but just last week, three (and possible a fourth) are popping through, including her two upper canines. Luckily, she doesn't seem to be in any discomfort. She struggles with chronic constipation and though we have her on some OTC meds, it doesn't seem to be helping. I'm reluctant to increase the amount of the medication and think we may need to be referred to a specialist. At her last appt she was 34 inches tall and 21.75 pounds. Still a skinny minny, super-model in the making, just like Sage.
She has recently begun pretend play which just cracks me up. She's always liked to dress up and emulate Sage, but now she'll initiate the play on her own. She'll crawl around the house and meow like a cat or bark like a dog. And oh my gosh is it cute!!
She continues to pick up new words on a daily, sometimes hourly, basis. Her current favorite words are "yeah" and more recently "mine" and "butt", which I'm okay with as long it's not the word "no".
She's experimenting with potty training and sits on her little potty several times a day, though has yet to produce anything.
She is still a very picky eater and I continue to worry way too much about every little bite that goes or doesn't go into her mouth.
She still LOVES LOVES LOVES to dance. I swear this kiddo is going to be a professional dancer. Since she was barely walking, she's exhibited an ability to move and shake like I've never seen, well not from a white baby anyway.
okay, I could obviously go one forever about the girls, but want to focus on work for just a minute.
So, I started my new job as a Psychiatric Social Worker in the ER at Children's Hospital. I've finally completed training and have started my shift, which is Friday 5-midnight, Sat and Sun 5:30pm-2:00am. I knew it was going to be a difficult transition into this setting, but I never knew how heart wrenching it would actually be. Just going to the cafeteria, I always pass little tiny kids that are obviously undergoing chemo or extremely sick in other ways. It's very frequent that there is a trauma kid in the ED and his/her screams are enough to pierce your heart.
Last night though, was particularly rough. A little 2 year old died. She had some ongoing medical issues, but her parents were bringing her in for diarhea. She died on the way to the hospital. Fortunately, I didn't see her body, but some of my coworkers did and it was hard enough to hear them talk about her. I did, however, see her parents (and the other family members who came to be with them) on and off through out the night. I won't soon forget their cries or their tears. I had a lot of trouble sleeping last night/this morning and I can't stop thinking about how fragile life is, how lucky I am to have healthy kids, how unfair it is that so many young innocent little lives have to be ended so abruptly.
...and now the doc just came in and wants me to see a 13 year old ingestion case...
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Friday, September 25, 2009
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Child Find Eval
Sienna has been declared "normal". Now, usually I wouldn't get excited about this, as in my opionion normal=boring, and I know that she is far from boring, but when having a developmental evaluation conducted on your child, normal=good. So, in this instance, I was so happy to hear that my baby is "normal." Basically, the experts think that her pediatrician was over-reacting and that he misunderstood the guidelines of what constitutes a language delay. He (the pediatrician) was very convincing when he explained that "complete strangers should understand 100% or her words, which should equal between 5-10 words" at 18 months of age. This concern of his accompanied with the face that Sage was on the complete other end of the spectrum with 75 recognizeable words at 18 months of age, was enough for me to consent to the evaluation.
Well, I found out that only 60% of her words should be recognizeable to strangers. And, as I knew would happen, she has had a huge explosion of words in the past 3-4 weeks, which she certainly shared with the evaluators. She now says the following words with very good clarity (they knew what she was saying without me having to interpret): baby, bubble, pop, yeah, poo-poo, pee-pee, ball, juice, done, boo-boo, owie, push, dada, bee, and I know there's a few more that I can't recall at this moment. Even though the appointment was very time consuming and I knew in my gut that there was nothing wrong, I'm glad we went through with it, as it gives me a peace of mind and reassurance that my baby is just fine.
Well, I found out that only 60% of her words should be recognizeable to strangers. And, as I knew would happen, she has had a huge explosion of words in the past 3-4 weeks, which she certainly shared with the evaluators. She now says the following words with very good clarity (they knew what she was saying without me having to interpret): baby, bubble, pop, yeah, poo-poo, pee-pee, ball, juice, done, boo-boo, owie, push, dada, bee, and I know there's a few more that I can't recall at this moment. Even though the appointment was very time consuming and I knew in my gut that there was nothing wrong, I'm glad we went through with it, as it gives me a peace of mind and reassurance that my baby is just fine.
Friday, September 18, 2009
New Job
I'm so excited. I got my dream job. I'll be working in the ER at Children's Hospital doing psych evals. The shift is Friday, Saturday and Sunday from 6pm until 2am which is perfect since that will allow me to be home all week. I'll be able to drop off and pick up Sage from school. I'll be able to spend all day every day with Sienna. I'll be able to participate in Sage's school activities. I'll be able to spend quality time with Sienna working on her speech. I'll be able to sleep! I'll be able to do so many things with them that I've dreamed and hoped to be able to do since they were born. This is the next best thing to being a stay-at-home-mom. Of course, going from 56 hours a week(with both jobs that I've resigned from) down to 24 hours a week, even with a very nice pay raise, will definitely pose some financial predicaments for us. But, we'll figure it out one way or another. For now, I'm going to enjoy being on cloud 9 for a little while before that reality hits me.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Happy 5th Birthday Princess Sage
Sage had a wonderful birthday weekend, despite the freezing cold and rain that occured during her party. We packed the weekend full of fun. We had our weekly slumber party on Friday night and spent it preparing party favors and stuffing the pinata. On Saturday morning she had her first soccer practice, which she cried throughout due to not having the ball the whole time. We're going to try one more practice this weekend and if the same occurs, we'll be sticking to individual sports such as ballet and gymnastics. We then picked up lunch, scarfed it down, and then went to pick up her balloons and headed to the park to decorate and then to celebrate with her friends. After the party, we watched lots of princess movies. Sunday, we went to church and then to Target to spend some of her birthday money. We enjoyed the pretty weather by going back to the new park that we discovered that is adjacent to the soccer fields. Monday was her actual birthday and I took the morning off of work to take her to school, where they had her come to the front of the entire student body and recognized her as the birthday girl. I picked her up from school and took her to the dentist, where it was confirmed that she has her first cavity. Without having insurance, they want us to spend almost $500 on a baby root canal and cap. They came up with this treatment plan without even taking x-rays. That night we went to McDonald's to eat and play, as requested by the birthday girl. All in all, it was a great 5th birthday for Princess Sage, other than the dentist appt and tantrum during soccer practice of course. Here's a few pictures, and I'll try to get some more loaded in the near future.
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